Who am I and WHY do I think I should be g.o.d.

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example of Chartwell I could have handled better. Imagine how much GOOD energy I could have spread in those 6 years vs the NEGATIVE that MANY people got frustrated with me about!

Wed. Nov. 19, 2025, 7:00 am 

Am I the energy problem? I said we are ourselves the atmosphere. Did I myself create the evil ATMOSPHERE of my previous Regent Park home. Everyone seems surprised when inlay it was horrible. Maybe I was the horrible? YES! Maybe it all started  when could have handled a big problem of Chartwell far better than THEY did! explain. Maybe the fact everybody says I am an idiot that has never accomplished ONE thing .. but sure talks like I am god. Nah I am told I am a loser (Well just by my teenage daughter who is 45, 😡 but I have no friends, so that STICKS in your brain.) So I guesss since I figured my last move (die soon) why the hell do I have a BETTER solution than the company who runs 200 senior homes on Canada. If I am such an idiot why would my solution have been 100 x better, yet I DO never get anywhere .. my daughter is actually RIGHT. I think that totally ENRAGED me like some young men today at injustice. Maybe moving here and feeling respected and treated decently brought back my "happy". I have always thought people treated decently and FAIRly are good humans. Disrespect and injustiv=ce breed rage or despair. BOTH deplete the value of our Human VALUE exchange. The human family has a stock market and now our share values have collapsed! 

Did my rage at once again no one caring about my better answer, and in fact demonizing me as negative start to cloud EVERYTHING. Was the foundation of my anger at being only pawns in profit for the corporation creating the ATMOSPHERE of a horrible place? I bet that is what happened. I came here and immediately felt important and cared about. That so lifted my spirits, that I helped create the POSITIVE ATMOSPHERE in my new area! Is this the final proof that we become how we are treated. Treat me like I am nothing and I will show you my NOTHING can harm you too.😈 Is that what vandals (and mass murderers) are thinking? 🤔

Maybe in talking to my new neighbour, I just figured out the huge ENERGY vibration change here ..  vs old place! Maybe it is ME! I am the problem! And yes maybe my daughter is right "it is always about me." But NOT the way she means!! I am always wondering if I did something WRONG. See How TWISTY those Left brains are! Everything is a put down so you start to hate them. But in a way they are right! It is all about the ONION Conveyor belt of life. Onions as problems or new ideas just keep on coming! If you are a Left Action brain being you grab a shell or skin and get on with life. But a BALANCED or Right Brain Human WONDERS and questions thru all the onion layers. We want to UNDERSTAND the truth so we work our way through the layers to get to the heart of the (onion or) TRUE answer to the problem! Yes! we are slow but our answer will always be the better one! and we question what WE did wrong, we do NOT just blame "THE OTHER" so yes .. I guess it IS " .. always about ME" but in respect to how I help or HARM Others. Those twisty Left brains confuse us!!

NOW! .. when we find the REASON or cause of the problem Left brains say we make excuses and blame! Yet THEY are always blaming! Our search for cause to them = blame. I guess we just take everything out of their mouth as a shield or weapon against us. They are UNABLE to think deeply, only are able to focus on fast action without contemplation. Maybe is why they hate higher education and put us down as "intellectuals". Would simply seeing Left brains as PROTECTING themselves against or "WORD JUMBLE" 

I am looking at this heading .. I have never continued with the answer!! My ideas are all over .. WORSE than the diagram. A left brain wants order like the LIGHT diagram. AND!!! Only Their action will actually create the light!! So why do we hate each other, why do we demonize the Thinker vs the Doer? Because the same as everything! What we do not understand we GENERALIZE and run away from OR attack. I run away when I do not understand. THEY ATTACK so we GENERALIZE them as EVIL, or at least mean heading to CRUEL.

OMG .. have I found the answer to my despair listen to Ken Burns Revolution? There were so many different battles and enemies! and when related to romans etc. I wondered if I have been worng all my life .. Humans are NOT good .. we are too often BAD and heading EVIL! NO! There have just always been DISABLED humans .. missing too much of one hemisphere's brain wiring. If we are missing to much Left brain action wiring we are very frustrating to be around NEVER DOING just always wondering and questioning, not even DECIDING anything which is the beginning of DOING! Of course we would be HUGE frustration to left brains who just want to get the job done! This would be why my daughter goes on about I have never done anything in my life .. just talk and tell people what to do while I do nothing. Took me like 3 decades to recognize .. "OF COURSE idiot, I am a teacher preacher we never DO anything just PREACH!"

Decades ago I would go to our Fri nite dance place late and then leave early. My joke was I had to get back to "Saving the world". But I did honestly feel if I could combine the 2 biggest ideas in my mind .. we could have far better quality of life! If we could MANAGE the HUMAN family/ Home and its RESOURCES like my HOME ECONOMICS study  (but just a bigger family) .. ALONG with finding WHY my daughter so do NOT get along

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Sun. Nov. 30, 2025, 1:15 pm.

It has taken me 70 years to find the answer to my question, yet I still KNOW NOTHING! But my intuition and 6th sense were very GOOD, because many experts have authored books proving my connected beliefs. SUGAR and TV really DID destroy our brains and made us into the sheep FOLLOWERS that we are! But today you sadly can no longer FIND this varied RESEARCH. Our "knowledge" is totally controlled by google, meta and apple. If we could SACRIFICE and BOYCOTT these CONTROLLERS, we could actually bring them down. Do we still HAVE the ability to SACRIFICE, do we have any courage or bravery in our baby sheep nature? I did my part, my contribution of never ending Research, Evaluation, and Design. Now it is up to you to build my blueprint into connected templates everywhere. You have the varied skills and management connections I am missing. You can DO this .. or HUMANITY ends .. very very soon. I am almost 80 .. what do I care. I did this work for the young I thought HORRBLY unfairly treated by us Boomers. WE took everything and left you nothing .. not even jobs now! Should we have a war against OLD? .. or maybe for those still with a HEART, we could bring the older Boomers in, for their memory of wiser NATURAL conservation of RESOURCES.

My SKILL and expertise is CONNECTING OTHER'S Intelligence and expertise into one giant SYSTEM that creates TOTAL Human Health. I had constant questions and found answers connecting them ALL to answer the question .. "Why can we not just have base quality of life (QoL) for all? Why can we not build a WIN WIN System." Of course the answer to a WISE person you eventually become .. our system is not MEANT to be FAIR .. WIN for all .. our " ORDER System"  became a CON and is meant only for THEM to WIN. Those few families ACTUALLY in charge TAKE everything while the rest of us NORMAL good Humans are trying to UNDERSTAND what would be FAIR. NORMAL Humans are good decent FAIR beings. WE may have to remove the EVIL? selfish and shallow is the scale that is DESTROYING us. And it is found in LEFT brain wiring. Are the TOXINS of "progress" created more TOXIC to perhaps more sensitive RIGHT brain wiring that is missing in too many? Only BALANCED Brains can run a NORMAL world. Could we work together and trade our THINK (RB) vs ACT (LB) wiring RESOURCES?

Sun. Nov. 30, 2025, 2:30 pm.

As a kid I wondered why we would pollute our body with brown SUGAR water. (coke) As a Treat sure .. but just to add to our cells made of pure WATER, whenever we are thirsty? Seems STUPID!  Somehow I already had a fascination with what makes us healthy and must have felt it was a bigger RESOURCE than money. Maybe because my older sister had ( Epilepsy)? Today ?mental illness? I felt that we OURSELVES had a responsibility to care for our health, not destroy the CATHEDRAL for our soul with stupid COKE. Then go to a DR to name a disease and prescribe a drug! I guess that is where my idea of STUPID began, so I have had many decades to prove this and rant MORE. 

When gluten FINALLY seemed to be ready to destroy the CARE industry I was elated. Functional medicine FINALLY after 50 years respected WE build our body. I did pretty much hate my daughter when she dismissively said "there is more to health than gluten!". Sorry but .. after 50 years waiting, you can not say " you must be very happy" .. NO respect or care to understand mother whatsoever. It is true I do not understand Left brain ACTION people, and neglect THEIR needs. But I ranted the SAME Health thing her whole life. Hard to not notice it was a mission, unless absolutely no respect or caring. But we now know that is the character of Left brain DOERS vs Right Brain THINKERS. IF extremely OPPOSITE we will just never get along. But I DO learn from my more Left brain kids! After a month or 2 I undersatood what she must mean and saw she was absolutely correct! Kale and yoga will never help you when you are stressed out of your mind just to SURVIVE. When there is no ORDER security, trust or HOPE in your society YOU WILLL NEVER BE TRULY HEALTHY. So began the search for what we need in society (Our ORDER System) in order to be healthy 

belief in possibility is what the American Revolution gives us. But when you listen to ken burns many hours, you hear we were both sides .. HORRIBLE. But can we blame all of us for the POWER greed of SOME "Leaders"? We can only feel there is POSSIBILITY when there is a hope and Trust in FAIR. I question if us quieter THINKERS (who want to understand in order to find TRUTH to create FAIR) are still the masses? Or are Left brain screamer warriors the masses?When we are stressed just to SURVIVE we do get shallow and think less. SHALLOW is the scale to STUPID? and SELFISH is the scale to evil? and that is our basic life today, surviving with NO TIME TO THINK!! 

That is even BEFORE A I eats all our jobs. (hey only 1/3 job loss would create chaos and great rage damage.) Struggling to survive it is hard NOT to just be sheep. Life has changed so so much from the days I used to relax before bed, skimming thru decor magazines DREAMING of my someday B and B. There is so so much I no longer care to do (Architectural Digest, TV house fixer, furniture stores) .. because there is no HOPE or possibility to have a nice place and CALMLY relax, especially for my kids. 

Are we then left with only FAITH .. to be in HEAVEN will finally be better? Not FAIR for young people .. fine for OLD me .. but TERRIBLE loss for the young! WE have to be brave and QUIT .. quit the CRAP of our NOT normal Weird digital society. Could you share a cell phone .. only 1/3 day with it? Unless we do this BOYCOTT of our society, the NORMAL Human life of quality .. is for sure over.

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